The move

In this Pitch Unfairly rebuild, one slide reads "Our house scores 94 on dog-friendliness. The rug is the 6." Five labeled bars sit under it (Backyard 20, Couch capacity 20, Park distance 19, Humans home after 3pm 20, The white rug 15), with a big 94 in a ring on the right.

Why it works

• Our readNaming the flaw before anyone finds it makes the 94 easier to believe, since the audience sees the deduction and where it came from.
• Our readEach bar has a handwritten aside ("fenced, mostly", "we can move it"), so every weakness arrives with its mitigation attached.

What not to copy

The dog and the score are invented for the story. Keep the structure: a total, its components, the lowest one called out in the headline with a one-line fix.